A friend (my one friend) emailed and asked for another man rant on the BC... I haven't had too much time to do any man-hating lately, due to orchestrating parts of the vast right-wing conspiracy, but I couldn't resist giving it a shot. (Sidenote: I did google and look around for a similar list, but everything was either A. dumb and crude or B. stereotypical, with remarks about long dresses etc). Some of the "suggestions" below have been around since Adam and Eve, while others are particular to the age we live in today (for example, 100 years ago, men didn't have platonic female friends, which complicates things these days.)Suggestions for dating a traditional Catholic female:
1. Don't suggest attending Mass at a wreckovation (eg, anything that remotely smacks of a masonic temple).
2. Be honest, respectful and straightforward. Note: There is a difference between the honesty of saying, "I would like to date you" [yes, make it that simple] and "I'm not attracted to the way you dress." Esto vir!
3. Girly drinks are for females. Only.
4. If you're interested... act like it! What this means: If you're interested, say so. If you say you're going to call, call. If your way of contact is poking her on Facebook, you need to be punched in the head. As with #6, if you don't call/contact her, this translates to a woman that you don't want to call or contact her. And she will move on. And you will wonder what happened.
5. Hold the door. Obvious, yes, but this consistently ranks as one gesture that women really, really, really like. Translated: It means you are a gentleman.
6. While it may be tempting to prove you're one hot item by mentioning your female friends and ex-girlfriends, what this says to the woman is that you're not interested (which, if you're reading this list, you know that what you're going for is a demonstration of interest). I am referring to the very early stages of getting to know each other, whether it happens by way of being friends or dating; once the relationship has established itself, that is something different.
Let's do a play-by-play of how this happens:
7. Please... no bodily functions. You are trying to make an impression, right?
8. Suggest something out of the ordinary for a date (this is, perhaps, a personal preference of mine.) Rent a kayak, take an architecture tour, hit up an ethnic festival [see my bucket list of things to do in Milwaukee.] Break up the seriousness of discussing wreckovations, Communion in the hand, altar girls, and so on:)
9. If you're involved in charity/volunteer work, talk about it! Women find this terribly attractive:)
10. What goes around comes around. Which is why #2 is so important. Do I really need to go into specifics as to why it's wrong to date someone but flirt with/lead someone else on?
Whew. That was cathartic.
-Virginia
1. Don't suggest attending Mass at a wreckovation (eg, anything that remotely smacks of a masonic temple).
2. Be honest, respectful and straightforward. Note: There is a difference between the honesty of saying, "I would like to date you" [yes, make it that simple] and "I'm not attracted to the way you dress." Esto vir!
3. Girly drinks are for females. Only.
4. If you're interested... act like it! What this means: If you're interested, say so. If you say you're going to call, call. If your way of contact is poking her on Facebook, you need to be punched in the head. As with #6, if you don't call/contact her, this translates to a woman that you don't want to call or contact her. And she will move on. And you will wonder what happened.
5. Hold the door. Obvious, yes, but this consistently ranks as one gesture that women really, really, really like. Translated: It means you are a gentleman.
6. While it may be tempting to prove you're one hot item by mentioning your female friends and ex-girlfriends, what this says to the woman is that you're not interested (which, if you're reading this list, you know that what you're going for is a demonstration of interest). I am referring to the very early stages of getting to know each other, whether it happens by way of being friends or dating; once the relationship has established itself, that is something different.
Let's do a play-by-play of how this happens:
- Man says: So, I was watching the Brewers game with my friend Jennifer last weekend... and then my ex Tina called...SEE HOW THAT WORKS? Guys, take note.
- Woman thinks [and yes, I know women overanalyze some things, but again, you ARE trying to make a good impression, right?]: Wow, this guy can tell I'm interested in him... but he is so uninterested, that he has to prove it by bringing up his female friends, and throw in his ex for good measure just to make sure I get the point. Does he have feelings for one or both of them? Now I feel like I made a fool out of myself. I should go.
7. Please... no bodily functions. You are trying to make an impression, right?
8. Suggest something out of the ordinary for a date (this is, perhaps, a personal preference of mine.) Rent a kayak, take an architecture tour, hit up an ethnic festival [see my bucket list of things to do in Milwaukee.] Break up the seriousness of discussing wreckovations, Communion in the hand, altar girls, and so on:)
9. If you're involved in charity/volunteer work, talk about it! Women find this terribly attractive:)
10. What goes around comes around. Which is why #2 is so important. Do I really need to go into specifics as to why it's wrong to date someone but flirt with/lead someone else on?
Whew. That was cathartic.
-Virginia
10 comments:
ROFL!!!!!
I have a feeling you've experienced a few wreck-o-date-ions....
You may be jaded if, upon hearing that someone is saying a novena to meet a man to marry, you roll your eyes.
Ok, this blog makes me want to move to WisCanSun and hang out with you guys seriously.
I also wish I would have had this list when I was younger, although through my thick-headness I made it out alive and with a pretty sweet wife!
Also, the "Poke" comment made me laugh for realz!
This works with Protestant women too... come to think of it, most of it would make a good impression on a self-respecting atheist.
I laughed so hard at this list Virginia! It reminds me of my single days when I wondered if I would ever meet the perfect man (or at least one who had a handful of my requirements!) And then I met BC, who opened doors, and I couldn't believe that guys like that even existed anymore. Now his head is going to start swelling!
Mrs BC
Joe, travel Wisconsin! Next best thing to living here:) And SJ, neither are the blog's target market.
Mrs BC, thank you!
oh boy. I hope BadgerCatholic doesn't become some blog in which we treat ourselves to somebody else's whining.
It appears to me that Zignego has had some bad experiences dating, and she somehow thinks it's the men that need advice.
It sounds like a fisherman who set's out to catch trout but only manages to reel in catfish, then blames the catfish for not being a trout!
You don't think the problem is that the fisherman is fishing the wrong waters and using the wrong bait do you?
Virginia, you could paste an icon of the BVM on a pound of hamburger, but it wouldn't stop those outside the target market from frying up some burgers for Labor Day.
You may suspect that you are a closet Calvinist if you find yourself objecting to the hymn, "When We All Get To Heaven."
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